Welcome to the About Me page. Nice of you to be interested. Sometimes I’m naturally very friendly but can be shy or easily a little freaked out. For some reason real life can seem a bit surreal to me. I have been that way since I was young girl.
Back Story aka Personal History
I was born near the end of my parents’ marriage to each other. Although they were married to each other for 16 years I did not arrive until the last 3 years, so mainly I do not know what it is like. I do have some memories of when my parents were married but it was when I was so young I had not yet started school.
My Mom almost remarried when I was 7 but due to family politics, I felt I was not allowed to say that I was in favor of it and so lied and told them what I believed my older siblings wanted me to tell them. I do not actually know whether or not that was what my siblings wanted me to do, but that was what I thought. As far as I know, the mother and siblings still don’t know that: I wrote this post at age 48 years. Even if they did, nothing could be done about it.
My mother was a wise, well educated, very clean cut, responsible teacher type of lady a bit stressed out from having 3 kids and no husband or serious boyfriend.
My father, meantime, was happily remarried to another woman halfway between my age and my parents’ ages. She was nice. We gave my father and his wife some Hell for having left us, but only because he kept in touch and so I saw him one evening a week for ten years, then spent more time with he and his wife until I became a starter adult. He was a professor until I was about 15 and then he retired early.
In the beginning, his 2nd wife was this very shy, skinny little thing with very long hair. She was very bright and also kind and like myself was a lefty. She became much more mature and powerful over the years…going from being just 21 to her 30s and even 40s while I grew up. However, she never got to have children of ‘her own’ by my father; they were even denied adoption.
Both my mother and father’s 2nd wife developed careers after graduate school.
I’m very American. I have tended to be a progressive liberal type of person by nature and that was reasonably well supported by nurture. I appreciated my education and having clean cut mainly responsible parents. I was a latch key kid.
We did not have much money but were not ever malnourished or starving.
During my childhood, especially since we could not run around spending loads of cash, we got into reading. I read volumes of books. For additional stimulation I was allowed to sometimes try what the older kids were reading. In truth, it was not always easy and I have some memories of using the dictionary to help me deal with reading for leisure some novel of one of the older children’s.
In the 3rd grade the adults told me that I was weirdly intelligent, but not insultingly. So, they let me have some classes that were not like what most of the kids my age were doing because of it. I think that otherwise I would have sometimes known that was what it was, but other times I think I would have just felt that we noticed that I am peculiar and would have just shrugged it off or accepted it that way. Miriam is a little weird, but it’s OK. We like her anyway and she is OK about it. I am a lefty so half the time I would have imagined it was just that.
I have spiritual tendencies and tended to be bookish and shy but friendly. I may be a “natural witch” but did get “Christianized”. I love JC and all that and feel that’s as ordinary as speaking English of having grass as part of a lawn.
I liked swimming and walking but in late adolescence tried martial arts and experienced way more physical pain and had vast improvements in physical strength and flexibility and felt very empowered from that. I did also try other sports but was only JV girl’s soccer.
I hope this is not already way too much information. When I graduated from high school I moved in with my boyfriend because I was sure we actually loved each other and he was definitely one of my best friends. We were happy that we were not one another’s only friend or even only best friend but I was happy because he was a best friend and not a fling-a-ling boyfriend Lite, so to speak.
I had some relational shakedowns and chaos and changes for reasons which are not entirely my own fault. There was a lot that happened that was because of me and my own will but not everything…
When authors play God/dess
In fact, one reason I tried writing a novel was to play goddess – I had total control, which was great, since I had no guilt nor shame about being totally controlling when it was a fiction story. Given reality I carried on dealing with work, love and education to get one of those decent jobs with good pay we all hear about and some of us get to have.
Age 27 Motherhood & Graduate School
I became a mother at age 27, just as I began graduate school. The entire higher educational experience was devoted to equipping me to get a good day job other than being a creative writer. My mother told me to prepare for some other day job and I tried to obey.
There was a side thing going on with my writing back then to, hoping to go pro and maybe even generate a popular science fiction novel series that paid off well for me. By age 30 only a little bit had happened: a few publications of poems and short stories in small publications and only once did someone even say she would pay me to publish my work. During my 30s a few items appeared in magazines: some fiction and some nonfiction.
Meanwhile, it was like: help the baby learn how to use a spoon and the next year bring him to nursery and the year after that move from England back to my native USA.
A moment of benevolence amidst the self-interest
All of this going on and I also still hoped to really help a lot of people and some trees and animals and to be myself and have a good and happy adult life…In some ways I am very much just like all the other girls and women but in some respects I am not like anyone else on Earth. In 1986, the others at the high school I was at granted me Most Unique Girl. Maybe they were right to.
Conclusion: still odd
A lot of the time I am pretty normal but I am a little weird. Sometimes it is strange in an adorable way and other times it is just …you may find me or my point of view to be odd.